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REXBURG- Attractive transfer student, Lauren McKenney, who met for the first time with her new ward last Sunday, is obviously very spiritual.

McKenney, a general studies major with no professional experience beside a part-time modeling gig, expressed satisfaction with her new circumstances.

“I love this ward. I think every guy in the Elders Quorum came up to talk to me,” Said McKenney. “They really made me feel welcome.”

Her leadership was just as enthused about her arrival.

“You can tell just by looking at her that she is very spiritual,” said 1st Counselor in the Bishopric, Jed Montgomery. “We need that kind of spiritual energy in this ward.”

When asked what role this beautiful, but relatively talentless girl might hold, her Bishop, Tom Harrison said, “Oh we are definitely looking at Relief Society President material here. Just look at her. Sure, the current president served a mission, is a registered nurse, plays the piano and got 100 percent Visiting Teaching last month, but she doesn’t look half as spiritual as this new girl.”

Chad Toolman, a member of the ward’s Elders Quorum, said, “She laughed at all my jokes. I think a healthy sense of humor is a sign of deep spirituality. When I look at her, I just know that she’s the type of girl I want to marry.”

Others in the quorum agreed wholeheartedly, acknowledging that they too would like to get to know her better so that they might be strengthened by her testimony.

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5 thoughts on “Attractive New Ward Member Obviously Very Spiritual

  1. Very, very good stuff. The words “Her leadership” seem a bit clunky to me, but that might just be me. What about “The local ward leadership” instead? I would also add that the last two paragraphs are not as strong as the previous paragraph, which make them feel a bit anticlimactic. In other words, the initial paragraphs and the premise are so strong that the ending seems to just taper off instead of putting a nice exclamation point on the piece. What if Chad said something like “I know now why the Lord sent me to His university in Idaho. When I woke up in the middle of the night last night and saw her picture, um, the one I took with my phone, well, I just know that the burning I felt was a spiritual confirmation that my strict obedience as a missionary would soon be rewarded with this clearly spiritual, fair and delightsome, eternal help meet.”

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