Let’s face it, nobody is more proud of their childhood than 1690s kids! Whether it was helping your father build a log cabin, or starving to death in the winter, you know the 1690s were unforgettable. Here’s a list of stuff that only 1690s kids will get. Prepare for the nostalgia that will come faster than you can say “Burn the witch!”

The Stick


Only kids born in the 1690s really understand the stick. Whether it was used as a toy or as a disciplinary device, the stick left a lasting impression on every 1690s kid’s memory (and rear-end).

The Stocks

If you think stocks are something you buy and trade, you obviously weren’t born in the 1690s.

The Gunny Sack

Every 1690s kid sees this and thinks, “Oh yeah! It’s apple time! Time to eat apples I dare say!”

The Lantern

How do people today even live without the lantern? If you use electric light, you are probably a rich modern ingrate who was not born in the 1690s.

The Wagon

Remember when father would be all like, “Family, we must make haste to yonder town” and we would all jump in the wagon? Good times! I call backseat middle with my feet on the sick mule!

Witch Hunts

What 1690s kid could forget the excitement of a weekend witch hunt? YOLO!

Indian Raids

Talk about cray-cray! If you never got punked by a neighboring tribe, you probably weren’t a 1690s kid.

Not Dancing

Remember being on the dance floor getting low low low to your favorite jam? Me neither! The 1690s were simpler times.

Typhoid Fever
1690s kids can tell you what it really means to get swole. If you died of Typhoid Fever, you were probably a 1690s kid. But hey, everyone was doing it!


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